Stress, The Autonomic Nervous System & Acceptance of The Human Experience

This article has been bubbling inside me and evolving with me as time has gone on because I wanted to understand the role that Stress plays on our incredible Autonomic Nervous System (ANS). I felt it really applicable to share my findings; these are findings not just from the last couple weeks, they are from the last 10 years in all honesty. I have had a bumpy relationship with Stress and anxiety (haven’t we all!), but I definitely took its role in my life a bit more seriously when I learnt that it severely impacts our ANS, can impact our general health and therefore, every day of our lives.

Although it may seem quite obvious, of course right, Stress isn’t good for us. But at what point do we listen? When do we start to pay attention to the fact our body/mind/spirit might be struggling? Is it when something seems to manifest physically as an ailment of some description? And the list for these is endless – headaches, brain fog, forgetfulness, dizziness, chest pain, aches and pains, muscle tension, gut problems (which lead to a whole host of other issues); honestly, the list is vast. Or do you tend to get quite emotionally withdrawn, or irritable, or depressed, or overwhelmed? Do you grind your teeth, or have trouble sleeping? It’s such a minefield of ways that Stress can leak into our lives without us even attributing these things mentioned and so many other things that can affect behaviour or emotions; the list is terrifyingly long. This article won’t be doom and gloom in any way, I just feel it’s important and relevant to highlight the numerous ways in which our Stress levels can impact our body and our lives. So I’d like to go through the role of our ANS, why it’s important, and the impact that Stress has on it. But we’ll round up on positive notes I promise, I don’t want this article to be just another article about Stress and how to alleviate it. So join me on this ride through my own understanding of Stress, the effect on our body, and then let’s deep dive into tangible reasons for its existence and some nice material to aid your Stress levels in challenging times.

What is the Autonomic Nervous System & Why is it Important?

The Autonomic Nervous System (ANS) is a crucial part of the nervous system that controls involuntary bodily functions, meaning it manages processes that happen without our conscious effort. This system regulates essential functions like heart rate, breathing, digestion, body temperature, and blood pressure, ensuring that they operate smoothly and adjust to changes in our environment. It acts automatically, in the background, so we don’t need to think about it (for example, when to speed up our heart rate or produce more saliva). The ANS is divided into two main branches, each responsible for different aspects of bodily function:

Sympathetic Nervous System (SNS): Often called the “fight or flight” system, the SNS prepares the body to handle Stressful or dangerous situations. When activated, it increases heart rate, elevates blood pressure, and redirects blood flow to muscles, providing the body with a burst of energy and alertness. This system is essential for quick responses to immediate threats, but too much or prolonged SNS activation (as in chronic Stress) can lead to health issues.

Parasympathetic Nervous System (PNS): Known as the “rest and digest” system, the PNS helps the body relax and recover after a period of Stress or exertion. It decreases heart rate, promotes digestion, and helps the body conserve energy. When the PNS is active, the body can focus on long-term processes like healing and digestion. This branch counterbalances the effects of the SNS, helping us return to a state of calm.

How the ANS Works
The ANS operates by sending signals through a network of nerves that connect the brain to different parts of the body. These nerves reach vital organs, blood vessels, glands, and muscles, controlling their activity in response to both internal and external stimuli. For example, if you’re exposed to cold weather, the ANS prompts blood vessels in the skin to constrict, conserving body heat (honestly these human bodies are miraculous).

Importance of ANS Balance
A balanced ANS, where both the SNS and PNS can function optimally, is essential for maintaining overall health. Frequent SNS activation (like in chronic Stress) can lead to problems such as high blood pressure, immune suppression, and digestive issues. Regular relaxation and self-care practices can help support the PNS, allowing it to keep the body in balance and promote resilience against Stress. We’ll get into this later.

The ANS’s seamless, automatic control over vital functions makes it one of the body’s most essential regulatory systems, enabling us to adapt to changing situations while maintaining stability in key bodily functions.

What Role Does Stress Play on the Autonomic Nervous System?

Stress has a significant impact on the ANS. Under Stress, the SNS is activated, preparing the body to respond to perceived threats. This is characterised by:

• Increased Heart Rate & Blood Pressure: This ensures that blood and oxygen are rapidly delivered to muscles and essential organs.
• Dilated Pupils: Enhances vision, allowing for better focus on potential threats.
• Increased Respiratory Rate: Delivers more oxygen to the bloodstream to prepare for physical exertion.
• Inhibited Digestive Activity: Non-essential processes, like digestion, slow down or stop to conserve energy.
• Release of Stress Hormones: Adrenaline and cortisol are released, further amplifying the Stress response and increasing alertness.

While short-term activation of the SNS can be beneficial for dealing with immediate challenges, chronic Stress can lead to a prolonged "fight or flight" state, putting strain on the body and potentially contributing to conditions like hypertension, cardiovascular disease, and a weakened immune system.

After the immediate Stressor is managed, as we have seen, PNS helps return the body to a state of calm. This system works to counterbalance the effects of the SNS by:

• Decreasing Heart Rate & Blood Pressure: Promotes relaxation by slowing the heart rate and lowering blood pressure.
• Stimulating Digestive Activity: Helps resume digestive processes, facilitating nutrient absorption and energy storage.
• Reducing Muscle Tension: Allows muscles to relax, helping to conserve energy.
• Lowering Cortisol Levels: Helps return hormonal balance to baseline, reducing the alertness and tension associated with Stress.

Under chronic Stress, the PNS can become less effective at counterbalancing the SNS, leading to prolonged periods of elevated Stress hormones and related physiological effects.

Chronic Stress & Autonomic Imbalance

Chronic Stress gets ugly, it can lead to a long-term imbalance between the SNS and PNS, where the SNS becomes dominant, and the PNS has limited opportunities to engage. This autonomic imbalance is linked to various health issues, such as cardiovascular issues, digestive disorders, mental health challenges and immune system suppression.

Stress activates the sympathetic nervous system to help manage immediate threats, but when Stress becomes chronic, the autonomic nervous system remains in an overactivated state. The imbalance, with limited engagement of the parasympathetic nervous system, can lead to numerous physical and psychological health problems, again, as we’ve seen. Dr Joe Dispenza calls this state of constant fight and flight, an “altered” state. This isn’t a natural way of living and our systems are not designed to be this way long term so if we’re stuck in this ‘altered’ state, we really need to assess all the ways that we can assist our bodies long term health. We’ll take a look at some techniques that can help activate the PNS, promoting relaxation and resilience against Stress. With the science bit over, let’s move along…

Why Am I Stressed in the First Place?

This is an incredibly personal thing to you. But as I have come to see for myself, it’s generally a mix of several contributing factors that are completely dependent on your personal circumstances and your own experiences all the way from childhood to the present moment. So much happens to us throughout our lives and I don’t think I’ve ever met one person that hasn’t been scarred in one way or another, mentally or physically. So try to always take into account that we’re all so different, and we’re all made up of different experiences and sticky stuff. So the ways that we are now, we’re products of everything! Everything we’ve witnessed, challenges we’ve faced, our environments growing up, the things we’ve been taught, religions we’ve been introduced to, the beliefs that have been passed down to us whether they’re conscious or unconscious, we all have them! But ask yourself now, what beliefs do I have that don’t actually align with who I want to be or how I want to show up in the world. Make a real conscious effort to get to know those unconscious bits of yourself that you’d like to make changes to.

We ALL adopt coping strategies as children because intentionally or unintentionally our caregivers made mistakes, it’s unavoidable and we as the small people do what we feel we need to in those moments to stay safe. We have to learn how to navigate a big world as a small person; none of us get out of this unscathed – not that I’ve seen anyway. Your triggers are very personal to you; your relationship to Stress is your own but you do not have to navigate it alone. It can feel very overwhelming when you’re in the throws of a bad day, or week, or year even. For some of us even longer than that. For me it became a way of life, a habit, not one I liked but one I clearly felt ‘safe’ in. But something will always come along, maybe gently at first with a few aches and pains or Stress headaches here and there, to try and knock you back into homeostasis.

So it is my wish for you that you listen; listen to your body, listen to it’s nudges; don’t worry about the 1,000 ways that have made you Stressed in the first place, just make a decision now, a one-step at a time decision; ask yourself, does it serve you and your body, and your mind, to remain in this state of Stress and anxiety? Could your productivity be greater if you could manage your Stress levels? Are you able to listen to your inner knowing on a regular basis, or is it continually hidden by louder, more neurotic voices in your mind that are trying so hard to keep you “safe”, and stay relevant (the ego has to/wants to have a purpose and wants to exist!). Maybe you won’t get it right all the time, but you can take the first step to pattern interrupt your habits of Stress and anxiety. It all starts with questions and a general contemplation – who would I be if this Stress, anxiety, ailment, illness, insert your thing here, no longer defined my actions and my behaviour each day? What steps can I take to better serve my PNS today? So speaking of, let’s look at some simple ways we could ease up the Stresses on the body, mind and spirit (none of which are separate).

A Few Things to Try

I won’t make a huge list here because many of you have probably tried many things, just like I have. But I’ve come to wonder if what I was trying was taking me a longer way round. What I really needed was to sit with myself and ask myself what I needed in that moment. So I will make some “suggestions” here on bits and bobs I have tried personally over the years which has definitely been helpful for my PNS. Here are some gentle techniques that may help support your system when Stress arises.

Checking In with Subtle Body Scanning

How to Practice: Instead of a structured body scan, let your attention wander to areas that feel tense, heavy, or numb. Rather than trying to release or fix them, simply listen to what that area of your body might be signalling. If there’s tension in your jaw or shoulders, imagine asking these parts, “What are you holding onto?” and allow any thoughts or feelings to arise naturally.

Why It Works: This gentle curiosity builds trust between your conscious mind and your body, letting tension release naturally when it’s ready. You’re also moving out of "fix-it" mode, which can paradoxically heighten Stress.

“Soft Focus” Vision

How to Practice: This is a method often used to calm the nervous system by gently broadening your field of vision. Find a comfortable spot to look at (something non-stimulating, like a wall or tree) and relax your gaze, so you’re not staring but instead letting your vision soften. Notice what’s in your peripheral vision without focusing on any one thing.

Why It Works: When we’re Stressed, our vision often narrows, mimicking a survival response. Softening your focus signals to your nervous system that there’s no immediate threat, helping shift your body into a more relaxed state.

Tuning Into Your Breath’s “Pause”

How to Practice: Pay attention to the natural pauses between your inhales and exhales. Rather than controlling your breathing, simply notice the tiny stillness at the end of each breath. Spend a few moments here without deepening or changing anything.

Why It Works: This practice engages the parasympathetic nervous system without forcing it, as awareness of the breath’s natural rhythm reminds the body that it’s safe to relax.

Micro-Movement Exploration

How to Practice: Notice if there’s a specific area of your body that feels particularly tight or tense – this could be your shoulders, jaw, or even your stomach. Very gently, try small, slow movements with that area, like tiny circles with your shoulders or slight stretches with your neck. Listen to the speed and range that feels right.

Why It Works: Micro-movements give the body a sense of release and engagement without requiring a full stretch or big movement. This is a way to subtly discharge tension without activating more Stress.

Gentle Humming or “Voo” Sounding

How to Practice: Sit in a comfortable position, inhale deeply, and on your exhale, make a low, vibrating “voo” or “hmm” sound. Feel the vibration in your throat, chest, or even down to your belly. Repeat this a few times, focusing on how the vibration moves through your body.

Why It Works: This sound and vibration can stimulate the vagus nerve, which plays a huge role in calming the nervous system. Gentle humming also resonates in areas of the body that carry tension, allowing a soft release.

Creating Space for the Emotion

How to Practice: Sometimes, emotions feel “stuck” because we’re holding on too tightly. Try to bring your awareness to the emotion you’re feeling without labelling it as good or bad. Imagine there’s space around it—visualise it in a container that can expand. This can often allow the emotion to process without getting bottled up.

Why It Works: Emotions can sometimes feel overwhelming when they’re “compressed.” Creating mental space allows for easier processing and release, helping the body feel less trapped by the emotional energy.

Listening to your body is about observing without pushing or judging. These practices, done gently, can guide you to tap into your body’s natural rhythm of rest and recovery. It’s not about feeling relaxed every time but creating a space where your body feels heard, which is calming in and of itself.

Acceptance of Being Human

Accepting being human means embracing our imperfect, ever-evolving, and inherently vulnerable nature. It’s acknowledging that we’re not robots or superheroes—we experience a wide range of emotions, we make mistakes, we struggle, and we don’t have all the answers. To accept being human is to recognise that our value doesn’t lie in constant productivity, perfection, or always being in control. Instead, it lies in our ability to feel, to learn, to connect, and to adapt. Here are a few layers to what accepting your humanity might mean:/p>

Embracing Imperfection – Understanding that flaws and mistakes are natural. You might mess up, feel inadequate, or wish you could be “better” in some way, and that’s okay. Perfection is a concept, not a reality. We often place immense pressure on ourselves to meet impossible standards, and when we don’t, we feel like we’ve failed. Accepting imperfection softens this judgment and allows room for growth, self-compassion, and resilience.

Allowing for Vulnerability – Being human means we’re vulnerable to disappointment, hurt, and uncertainty. It means allowing yourself to feel these things without needing to “fix” them immediately or pretending they don’t affect you. Vulnerability connects us to others, letting us form bonds based on shared experiences. When we accept our own vulnerability, we’re less likely to view it as a weakness in others, and we develop a deeper empathy.

Owning Emotional Complexity – Emotions are complex and sometimes contradictory. You might feel joy and sadness, love and frustration, gratitude and anger, all at once. Accepting being human means letting these emotions coexist without forcing them to “make sense”. By letting emotions flow, we allow them to fulfil their natural purpose, like teaching us about our needs or prompting us to make changes. Suppressing them only builds internal tension, while acceptance allows for greater inner peace and understanding.

Letting Go of Total Control – Recognising that while you can control your actions, you can’t control everything that happens. Life involves uncertainty, and no matter how much you try to prepare, sometimes things don’t go the way you planned. Trying to control the uncontrollable leads to Stress and frustration. Accepting that you’re not responsible for everything allows you to focus on what you can influence, while releasing what you can’t.

Living with Uncertainty & Change – Accepting that change is constant and that certainty is often an illusion. We’re constantly evolving, and so is the world around us. Embracing change can reduce the anxiety that comes from clinging to how things are ‘supposed’ to be. Flexibility allows you to adapt, grow, and find meaning even as circumstances shift.

Allowing Yourself to Be “In Progress” – Accepting that growth is a lifelong process. You’re never truly “finished” becoming who you are. You’re allowed to still be learning, growing, and finding your way, even as an adult. The idea that we’re supposed to have everything figured out can create a lot of shame or frustration. Recognising yourself as a work-in-progress brings patience and an openness to learning.

Forgiving Yourself & Others – Being human includes making mistakes—sometimes big ones. It means holding space for the times when you or others fall short, without staying stuck in regret or resentment. Forgiveness allows healing, both within yourself and in your relationships. It’s a release of judgment and a practice of acceptance that everyone, including yourself, is doing their best with what they know.

Finding Meaning in the Messiness – Rather than viewing life’s challenges, flaws, and complexities as obstacles to happiness, seeing them as part of a larger, meaningful journey. Every experience, even the hard ones, contributes to growth and depth. Life’s messiness often feels random and challenging, but finding meaning in it allows us to face it with a sense of purpose and acceptance. This mindset can make life’s trials easier to bear.

Practicing Self-Compassion – Treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you’d offer a friend. Recognising that mistakes, failures, and insecurities are part of being human, not a reflection of your worth. Self-compassion is essential for true acceptance of your humanity. When you’re kind to yourself, you create a safe inner environment where growth and healing are possible.

Accepting being human is an invitation to live with more freedom and less pressure. It’s about leaning into what makes you uniquely yourself, with all of the contradictions, beauty, and complexities that come with it. In embracing our humanness, we invite patience, empathy, and a sense of peace with the ever-changing, imperfect journey we’re all on together.

Everyday life can and will come with its inevitable challenges. We will face uncertainty, trials and tribulations, but our freedom from stress, anxiety and a whole host of other issues can rely upon how we process these experiences and ultimately, how we handle ourselves in these moments. Our body relies heavily on our general attitude, our behaviour and our reactions to these challenges. So we owe it to our ANS to learn how to cultivate self-compassion, forgiveness, patience with life’s pace and an acceptance of what is. Any feeling we have is safe to feel. It’s only through allowing it to be what it is, that we can accept our emotions fully. Richard Rudd of the Gene Keys says on anxiety, that if we can say to it, “I no longer care if you stay or leave, I am completely content with you to live here with me for the rest of my days if you want to, I give up, it’s ok, you can. I know I am safe, I know this is just a feeling” – this level of acceptance will ultimately loosen its grip on us and allow us to transform its existence entirely. We are human. Tell me a greater journey than the journey through your very own personal experience.

“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change” – Carl Rogers

“Allowing is the first layer of disarming anxiety. Allowing becomes acceptance and acceptance is where the transformation really starts to happen” – Richard Rudd