The Colorado River Toad
18 October 2024

Psychedelic Experiences & The Colorado River Toad

So, I found myself venturing into an experience that can only be described as surreal, I smoked the potent secret of the Mexican toad, Bufo Alvarius. Going into it, I had only the faintest understanding of what lay ahead, and honestly, that ignorance was a blessing. No preparation, no amount of research, could have braced me for what turned out to be the most transformative experience of my entire life. I had dabbled in various psychedelics before, but nothing, absolutely nothing, could have ever prepared me for what Bufo had in store. Attempting to compare it to an acid trip or a psilocybin journey would be like trying to describe the vastness of the universe in the terms of a single drop of water.

Only a few days after a wild New Year’s celebration that left me utterly spent, I decided to dive deep into this new experience. That night of revelry had been a whirlwind of psychedelic exploration; I had smoked DMT for what felt like an eternity on New Year’s Eve, indulging in its many layers, while also under the influence of two tabs of acid. We were nestled in a cosy cabin by the lake, a group of friends huddled around a fire, our souls intertwined as we celebrated the New Year with warmth and laughter. From the outside, it was a picture-perfect scene, friends gathered in a charming cabin, but inside my mind, I was soaring through realms that felt like I was visiting a dozen different planets simultaneously.

Psychedelic Trip

I thought that night would be the pinnacle of my transcendental escapades, or at least a high point I wouldn't soon surpass. How naïve I was! I had no inkling that just days later, I would undergo an experience so profound it would feel as if I had danced with death itself, only to claw my way back to existence, weeping with an overwhelming sense of renewal and clarity. What unfolded was not just an exploration of consciousness; it was a seismic shift in my perception of reality, a confrontation with the very essence of life and death. In that moment, I learned that the universe is far more intricate than I had ever dared to imagine. Bufo challenged every belief I held, shattered my understanding of existence, and ultimately gifted me a perspective that would forever alter my journey through this life.

My Canadian friend Tony, who has a knack for forging connections with fascinating people, crossed paths with a seasoned shaman renowned for his expertise in the transformative practices of Bufo and Kambo. To my amazement, he discovered that this shaman had both of these powerful frog medicines readily at hand. Sensing that opportunities like this are rare and fleeting, I made a bold decision. I chose to embrace the unknown and dive headfirst into this experience. What I didn’t fully grasp at the time was that this wouldn’t just be a plunge into the depths as it would be an extraordinary journey into the profound, a leap that would take me far deeper than I ever imagined.

What exactly is the Toad Known as Bufo Alvarius?

This extraordinary creature is a unique frog found in the arid landscapes of the Sonoran Desert, which spans parts of Mexico and Arizona. But don’t let its unassuming appearance fool you; this amphibian possesses remarkable psychoactive properties that have captivated curious minds for centuries. The magic of Bufo Alvarius lies primarily in its secretions, which contain two potent compounds: bufotenin and 5-MeO-DMT. While there is a wealth of scientific exploration surrounding this frog, the true alchemy occurs when these secretions are carefully harvested and smoked. This ritual unlocks an otherworldly experience that transports users to dimensions beyond their wildest imagination. It’s important to note that the common myth about licking the frog is not accurate; the traditional method involves smoking the extracted secretions. And let me tell you, the journey is nothing short of astonishing. The enormous intensity of the experience can leave participants feeling as if they’ve just transcended the very fabric of reality itself. It opens doors to the unknown and invites profound introspection, making it one of the most transformative encounters one can have in the world of psychedelics. Buckle up! This is not just an adventure; it's a mind-expanding exploration that promises to alter your perception forever.

Safe to Smoke

Is It Safe to Smoke Bufo Alvarius?

When it comes to experiencing Bufo Alvarius, a powerful psychedelic derived from the toad's secretions, safety should be your top priority. This is not a journey to embark on lightly or alone. If you’re considering this unique dive into altered consciousness, please heed this advice: always engage with someone who possesses genuine experience with the medicine, ideally a skilled shaman. For your initial encounters, accompanying someone well-versed in Bufo is crucial. I urge you never to attempt this solo. In my experience, I witnessed first-hand the challenges that can arise. A friend of mine, for instance, became physically ill and vomited during both of his sessions, an unsettling reaction. Thankfully, we had a knowledgeable shaman present who understood how to navigate such occurrences; without their guidance, we would have been utterly lost in those moments.

Additionally, I observed another friend who struggled to maintain control during her experience, often rolling back and forth in distress. The shaman had to adjust her position multiple times to ensure she could breathe properly. While having a sober friend nearby for support can provide some comfort, their lack of specific expertise in handling Bufo's powerful effect pales in comparison to having someone who truly understands the complexities of the medicine. The essence of a Bufo trip is that you largely relinquish control over your mind and body. This lack of agency can be daunting, often leading to moments of sheer panic if confronted alone. Thus, the importance of a supportive group cannot be understated. Personally, I found great solace in having a circle of familiar and understanding people who patiently guided me back to reality, grounding me as I traversed the depths of my experience. Their reassurance and presence were invaluable, far exceeding what I initially anticipated. In summary, if you consider venturing into the world of Bufo Alvarius, prioritise your safety by seeking out experienced guidance. The journey can be profound, but it’s one best taken with those who can support you through its challenges.

Experiencing Bufo Alvarius

A group of four inseparable friends and I gathered in a serene setting, drawn together by a potent combination of curiosity and a deep desire for transformation. Our destination was a shaman, a wise and experienced guide skilled in the ancient practices of Bufo and Kambo, the sacred medicines derived from frog secretions. Two of our friends, committed to the path of healing, opted for Kambo, a ritual that involves applying the powerful secretion through carefully made incisions on the skin. This process is intense, often leading to a profound and exhausting cleanse that sees the body purge deeply held toxins and emotional burdens. As I watched the ceremony unfold for my friends, the reality of Kambo's harshness struck me. Their bodies trembled and convulsed with every wave of intensity, and I felt a strong instinct to step back. At that moment, I resolved to forgo Kambo, perhaps forever, as I witnessed the sheer brutality of the experience. However, the allure of Bufo was undeniable, and my excitement surged. One by one, we prepared to embark on our journeys with this powerful substance. The three of us opting out of Kambo took our turns first, with Tony leading the charge. He approached the ritual with unwavering courage, inhaling the shimmering smoke of the Bufo with the sincerity of a true seeker. Moments later, I observed his lanky frame begin to tremble; his long legs wavered beneath him as the shaman gently guided him to the earth. Tony lay there in silence for what felt like an eternity, lost in the depths of his experience. When he finally returned to the present, he sat up, his eyes wide yet vacant, rendered speechless for the first time I’d ever witnessed in our years of friendship.

Next was my wife’s best friend, Kiki, who similarly surrendered herself to the transformative embrace of Bufo. Watching their journeys unfold was a powerful prelude, but I knew nothing could truly prepare me for what lay ahead. The shaman, sensing my readiness, led me to an open grassy area, a sacred space bathed in gentle sunlight. He began the process by blessing my heart and head, establishing a connection that felt both grounding and transcendental. With a steady hand, he ignited the pipe and held it with reverence, guiding it towards my lips. "Inhale deeply," he urged, his voice a calm anchor amid the rising anticipation. As the smoke poured into my lungs, I inhaled deeply, immersing myself in the experience until I could hold it no longer. The moment I exhaled, a wave of sensation swept over me, and I erupted into a fit of uncontrollable coughing, the very essence of Bufo igniting every nerve in my being. The journey had begun, and I was ready to embrace whatever revelations awaited me.

Experiencing Bufo Alvarius

The transformation began instantaneously, sweeping over me in a surge of psychedelic energy. The trees before me morphed, their solid forms dissolving into a kaleidoscope of liquid spirals and intricate fractals. It was as if the boundaries of reality had collapsed, granting me access to the most vivid and astonishing visuals I had ever witnessed. For a fleeting moment, every neuron in my brain ignited, opening a portal to a universe brimming with colour and light. An exhilarating weightlessness enveloped my body, and as I summoned the last remnants of my awareness, I raised a salute to my friends, a silent promise that I would reunite with them on the other side of this transcendent experience. I felt my body gently surrender to the earth, the shaman's hands guiding me down to the soft embrace of the grass beneath me. Then, the world erupted into a riot of colours and shapes, and I was no longer a separate entity but rather a fluid part of this vibrant tapestry. I drifted between realms, losing all sense of physical form, becoming one with the vivid hallucinatory dreamscape unfolding around me. Whether my eyes were open or shut was a question I could not answer; all distinctions between perception and existence blurred into an exquisite chaos.

But just as swiftly as the colours surged forth, darkness consumed my vision. In mere seconds, I was plunged from that breath-taking panorama into an all-encompassing void. An eerie stillness enveloped me, devoid of sound or sensation. It was not the embracing arms of sleep or the whimsical exploration of dreams, but rather an encounter with the essence of nothingness. It was as if I had slipped into an infinite abyss, a taste of death itself. Strangely, even in that depth of silence, my subconscious seemed to traverse a profound spiritual journey, a pilgrimage fraught with challenges that would leave me trembling upon my return to the tangible world. In what felt like an eternity compressed into 30 seconds, the transition from inhaling the smoke to succumbing to unconsciousness transpired. I yearned to articulate what lay in the chasm between my loss of awareness and the moment I emerged back into the realm of the living. Gradually, my senses flickered back to life. Sound reignited first, followed by sight, and finally, as if gravity reasserted itself, I rolled over to find solace in the earth beneath me. It was reminiscent of a shipwreck survivor finally finding dry land after drifting in the merciless sea, alone and desperate for reprieve.

Despite the blank slate of memory regarding what transpired during my journey, I emerged feeling as though I had traversed an arduous odyssey, one that rattled the very core of my being. Words escaped me in those moments of realisation, but through reflection and shared narratives with fellow seekers, I would come to describe the experience as akin to the throes of death followed by a seismic rebirth. In that suffocating stillness, I had embraced the tranquil acceptance of mortality, suspended between existence and oblivion. Crawling back into consciousness from that abyss, I was struck by a profound epiphany regarding the fragile beauty of life itself. Tears streamed down my cheeks upon my return, unbidden and uncontrollable, a cathartic release of raw emotion that enveloped me entirely. I couldn’t help but notice the stark contrast; my friends’ experiences seemed straightforward, almost serene in comparison. They inhaled, succumbed to the void, and gracefully floated back to reality, while I lay there, a sobbing heap with a whirlwind of unprocessed feelings swirling around me. I lingered on the ground, staring intently at my hands as a means of grounding myself, trying to grasp the reality that I was alive and present once more. Each detail of my existence sparkled with an intensity previously unnoticed. A wave of indescribable gratitude washed over me; I was acutely aware of the miracle of being alive. In that moment, I understood how precious life truly is, and how deeply intertwined we all are with the vibrant tapestry of existence.

My Bufo Experience

Profound Insights from My Bufo Experience

Occasionally, the true essence of a journey lies not merely in the journey itself, but in the profound lessons that arise along the way. My experience with Bufo was a crystallisation of this truth. While my friends and I embarked on this experience together, each of us emerged with unique insights, shaped by our individual perceptions. Despite sharing similar sensations and explorations, our interpretations diverged significantly. One thing we collectively acknowledged, however, was the stark contrast between the transcendent journey we had just undergone and the mundane tasks awaiting us, emails to answer and work calls to make, just hours later. Ah, the irony of modern life: one moment you’re staring into the abyss, and the next, you’re back to being tethered to your screen. Typical Monday, right?

For me, the most profound realisation that emerged from this surreal experience was an overwhelming sense of gratitude for life itself. As I tried to articulate the tears streaming down my face, I found it challenging at first to pinpoint their source. Eventually, it became clear: these tears were a manifestation of pure, unfiltered love for existence, for every fleeting moment we so often take for granted. I recall one specific moment before indulging in Bufo that struck me profoundly. My friend Tony lay sprawled on the grass while Charlie, the dog, snuggled against him by the riverbank. To an outsider, it might have appeared as a mundane scene, but in that moment, it radiated beauty and warmth, a moment made even more poignant after my transformative experience.

In the immediate aftermath of the Bufo journey, I found myself retreating from the group, immersed in a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions as I attempted to process what had just transpired. The environment wasn't anything to write home about, a makeshift gathering in someone's backyard, mere stones’ throw from a noisy construction site across the river. The ramshackle house on the property offered little comfort to the senses. Yet, in those post-Bufo moments, everything around me transformed in significance. Elements I would have previously overlooked suddenly shimmered with meaning and beauty.

It was as if a veil had been lifted, allowing me to embrace life in all its myriad forms and moments. The realisation that I was emerging from the depths of an abyss filled me with an unparalleled sense of joy. When I rolled over and felt the cool earth beneath me for the first time, it occurred to me that I had never experienced such profound happiness and gratitude. Bufo reframed my perspective on life with unparalleled clarity and intensity. This experience isn’t for everyone but if you find yourself in a state of readiness, mentally and emotionally, it's an adventure that can genuinely redefine your outlook on existence. While the journey may be challenging, the insights gleaned from it can be nothing short of transformative. In a world often consumed by the trivial, an encounter like this can shine a light on the extraordinary beauty inherent in every moment we have the privilege to live.

“The underlying solution - repeated again and again - is to recognize that your brain is producing the visions. They do not exist. Nothing exists except as your consciousness gives it life.” - Timothy Leary, The Psychedelic Experience