Making Space for Growth: Reflecting, Releasing & Moving Forward

I don’t know about you, but the older you get, the more reflective you become right, and you begin to be grateful for what before you would have considered “small things” and fret a lot less about stuff that would have bothered you previously. There are so many things that grab our attention away from ourselves (I discuss detoxing from technology in my previous article) and whilst that is absolutely inevitable and indeed a part of life, I really do feel that it doesn’t have to be the only way for us. I really don’t want “distracted” or “otherwise engaged constantly” to be a part of how others remember me at the end of my journey. I believe we need to start exactly where we are, with exactly what we have and really address, assess and examine what really matters to us individually and think about how we’re living our lives. So many of us, TOO many of us are living lives we’re not 100% ok about and doing things we’d really rather not be doing, so even if it means starting small (which I’d personally recommend anyway) to make changes in your life for your benefit, then small it is!

I haven’t got a clear direction as such for this article (great statement I know) as I don’t want to do all of the “New Year New Me” bol…I mean stuff, but I definitely want to provide prompts, contemplations and questions we can take into the beginning of a New calendar year and perhaps give you some questions you can ask yourself about where you’re headed, and how you can incorporate more of YOU into your life in small manageable ways. I am feeling a bit of a call to touch upon parenting as well, considering it’s such a big part of my own life. So come along with me through these contemplations and hopefully you can gain some clarity on your own special path towards your authentic way of being on this awesome planet we call our home.

Questions For Reflection – Journal Prompts

I don’t believe in the New Year New Me statement as I mentioned, I think it comes with a heavy burden and an expectation onto ourselves for where we are doomed from the start! I could of course be absolutely wrong and it could work for some, however I know it to fail miserably for the many and I believe this is down to too much pressure to change habits, sometimes of a lifetime all at once! But for this we need root cause and lots of heavy reflection and consistent, repetitive, dedicated changes, which is not impossible and you CAN change whenever you want, just don’t put too much pressure on yourself to change BECAUSE it’s a New Year; the odds will not be in your favour. Instead, I have come up with some journal prompts that I know have helped me and others at this time of year – I think they’re great ones to sit and reflect with so I hope they inspire you to do just that – sit with them, contemplate them, and get real honest with yourself about what has been, what is currently, and where you wish to see yourself in the not so distant future. Feel free to choose a few prompts that resonate most with you and revisit others throughout the year for continued reflection and growth:

Gratitude & Appreciation
What am I most grateful for as I look back on the past year?
Who or what had a positive impact on my life that I may not have fully acknowledged yet?
What small, everyday moments brought me joy that I want to remember?

Life Purpose & Legacy
What kind of person do I want to BE this year, and how can I take steps toward embodying that?
What values do I want to prioritise in my decisions and actions?
How do I want to be remembered by the people around me at the end of this year?

Mindfulness & Presence
How can I stay more present in my everyday life?
What practices or rituals help me feel grounded and connected to the moment?
How can I create space for stillness and reflection in my routine?

Joy & Creativity
What activities or hobbies light me up, and how can I make more time for them?
What new experiences or adventures do I want to try this year?
How can I bring more playfulness and joy into my daily life?

Relationships & Connection
Who do I want to connect with more deeply, and how can I nurture those relationships?
What boundaries do I need to set to protect my energy and mental health?
How can I express love and appreciation more openly to the people who matter to me?

Personal Growth & Intentions
What habits or practices do I want to cultivate to support my well-being?
In what areas do I want to challenge myself to grow?
How can I show more kindness and compassion to myself and others?
What limiting beliefs do I want to release, and what empowering beliefs do I want to embrace?
What does living authentically mean to me, and how can I embody it this year?

Vision for the New Year
What is one word or theme I want to define this year? Why?
How do I want to feel at the end of this year, and what can I do to align with that feeling?
If I could accomplish just one thing this year, what would it be, and why is it important to me?
What areas of my life need the most love, attention, or healing?
What would a successful and fulfilling year look like for me?

Reflection on the Past Year
What were the most meaningful moments or achievements from the past year? Why did they matter to me?
What challenges did I face, and how did I grow from them?
Which relationships brought me joy or taught me important lessons?
What habits or patterns no longer serve me, and how can I let them go? What would letting them go mean to me/for me?
What was the biggest surprise of the past year, and what did I learn from it?
How did I show up for myself in moments of difficulty?
What parts of myself have I outgrown?

These questions are an awesome way for you to take some time to sit with yourself and get honest and real, but you don’t have to limit it to just your own journals, why not sit with a loved one, a close friend or partner etc, and contemplate these things together? It’s such a beautiful way to get clear on certain things and have another perspective into your stuff – I sat and did these with my husband and it was such a beautiful way to connect with each other and get clear on our joint and personal ideas for this next year. Give it a go, there are no rules to how this should be done.

Letting Go

The truth is, from my humble perspective, we think we have lots of time, and we could be right if we’re lucky enough to be graced with life for decades to come then yes, we have some time, but when it comes to time to follow dreams or live vicariously, to be wild and free being exactly who we want to be, how long do we have to embrace that? Are you living that way for yourself already (amazing if you are!)? Or are you too, like many of us, feeling a bit, stuck? Stuck could be in life, business, in habits, living situations, so all; mentally, physically and spiritually. So going back to my truth, we think we have time, but what if we don’t? Things change in moments! Moments are fleeting. So letting go of what doesn’t serve us anymore, whatever or whoever it is, is so important.

Letting go of things that no longer serve us can be transformative, but it requires intention and self-compassion. You hear it a lot right, just let it go, does it work anymore, no? Then let it go… sometimes it’s easier said than done, but it’s not impossible. Here are some healthy and practical ways in which to release what could be holding us back:

Acknowledge What You’re Holding On To
Reflection: Take time to identify habits, beliefs, relationships, or past experiences that feel heavy or stagnant. What stories are you still telling yourself that just aren’t helpful anymore? Notice patterns of dissatisfaction or resistance. Often, what we resist facing is what most needs our attention. Journaling can help clarify what needs to be released.
Acceptance: Recognise that it’s okay to let go and that it doesn’t diminish your worth or the value these things may have once brought to your life.

Practice Mindfulness
Mindful Awareness: Pay attention to when you feel drained, resentful, or unaligned. These feelings often signal areas that need release.
Breathing Exercises: Use mindful breathing to centre yourself. Visualise, on every exhale the energy or emotion you no longer need to hold onto, and imagine it being lovingly taken from your body.

Rituals for Letting Go
Write and Release: Write down what you’re letting go of on paper, then safely burn or tear it up as a symbolic gesture.
Physical Release: Use activities like yoga, dancing, or even a walk in nature to physically embody the act of letting go.
Declutter: Clean out spaces in your home AND digital life, removing knick knacks, ornaments or digital files and apps that no longer spark joy or serve a purpose. This one is very effective.

Reframe Limiting Beliefs
Challenge Narratives: Identify beliefs or self-talk that feel restrictive. Ask yourself, “Is this absolutely true?” and, “What would I rather believe instead?”
Affirmations: Nothing too airy fairy, but just trying to replace limiting thoughts with empowering affirmations. For example, "I release this (speak into what/who it is) that no longer serves me, and I welcome expansion, growth and joy instead."

Practice Forgiveness
Forgive Others: Letting go of resentment doesn’t mean condoning harm, but it frees you from carrying the weight of any anger or pain. You don’t even need the other person to know that you ‘forgive them’, and you’re not above them in any way so sometimes they don’t even need to know, you’re just releasing the hurt part of yourself that another may have contributed to, and declaring, “I no longer need to carry the energy of this pain from this person, this person just did the best with what they knew – I release this painful energy from my energy field/being now”.
Forgive Yourself: Release guilt or regret for past choices by acknowledging that you really did your best with the knowledge you had at the time, and that’s enough. Forgiveness to thyself is everything.

Set Boundaries
Communicate Needs: Create healthy boundaries in relationships, workplaces, or personal habits that drain your energy.
Respect Your Time and Energy: Let go of saying “yes” out of guilt or obligation. Practice saying NO to things that your gut responds an icky feeling to. Learn what’s a f**k yes and what’s a f**k no, and honour it!

Embrace Non-Attachment
Let Go of Outcomes: Focus on your efforts and intentions rather than needing a specific result. This is especially important too (but of course not specific to) I feel if you’re a parent!
Release the Past: Accept that you cannot change what has happened, you can only decide how you move forward.

Seek Support
Talk to Someone: A therapist, coach, or trusted friend can help process feelings and validate your experiences. Remember though this isn’t always necessary as everything is inside you, but it can absolutely be very helpful and worth exploring.
Community: Surround yourself with people who inspire growth within you and encourage your release process.

Focus on What You’re Gaining
Reframe Letting Go: Instead of seeing it as a loss, view it as making space for new opportunities, relationships, or habits. Change your perspective. Visualise the Future: Imagine how light, free, and aligned you’ll feel without the burdens of what no longer serves you.

Celebrate Progress
Acknowledge Growth: Celebrate even small steps in releasing what holds you back. This reinforces your ability to move forward.
Be Patient: Remember, letting go is a process and doesn’t have to happen all at once. It WON’T happen all at once. Be gentle.

Parenting

I thought I would pop a section in here all around Parenting; a very large part of my own life. There are a lot of parents out there and a lot of parents that need guidance and help that don’t necessarily feel as though they are getting that. So I am hoping this section can provide some support and help you feel seen in some way, whomever you are and whatever your situation. If none of this applies, that's cool, feel free to skip ahead to the next section.

Parenting is an extraordinary journey filled with challenges, and your awareness and willingness to address the relationships with your children reflect deep care and courage. It’s SO essential to remind yourself that parenting is inherently difficult, and perfection is neither possible nor necessary. Reflecting on your struggles and recognising patterns that trigger impatience, such as feeling overwhelmed or tired, can help you prepare for those moments with greater mindfulness.

Understanding your child’s perspective is key. For example, I have a six and three year old and they’re navigating big emotions, testing boundaries, and learning how the world works. By imagining the world through their eyes, we can find our reactions softening, allowing us to focus on their underlying needs, like connection or comfort. Acknowledge their feelings with empathy, naming their emotions to help them feel seen and understood, while creating a nurturing environment that strengthens your bond. Building a strong connection can also come through intentional moments of play and laughter. Taking even ten minutes a day to play together without distractions can work wonders for their sense of security. Humour can be a powerful tool to diffuse tension I’ve found, and my boys love this. Turning mundane moments into playful interactions or role-reversals. At the same time, setting clear boundaries with kindness and explaining the reasons behind rules can help them understand expectations without feeling overly controlled (this is a hard one to get right all the time though). Offering choices within those boundaries gives kids a sense of independence and agency, which I feel is really important.

Caring for yourself is just as important as caring for your child. Taking time to recharge, whether through quiet moments, support from friends or a therapist, or simply reflecting on the small wins in your parenting journey (like making popsicles from healthy smoothies and they love them!), can make a world of difference. When challenges arise, practicing mindfulness, pausing before reacting and using calming mantras can all help you respond (not react) with greater patience. If you do lose your temper, a sincere apology not only repairs the moment but also models emotional regulation and accountability for them.

Parenting, I’ve found, is not about perfection but about progress. Every effort you make, every moment of connection, and every instance of repair builds a foundation of trust and love. Celebrate the small victories and remind yourself that you’re both learning and growing together, one day at a time.

Exploring New or Existing Passions

Exploring passions, whether they are new discoveries or rekindling old flames, can bring renewed energy and purpose to the new year ahead. So start by setting aside dedicated time to immerse yourself in these interests. For new passions, begin with curiosity, do some research, take classes, or join communities and groups that share your enthusiasm. For old passions, reflect on what drew you to them in the first place and identify ways to re-engage, perhaps by upgrading your skills or setting fresh goals. The key is to allow space for experimentation without judgment, embracing both the progress and occasional setbacks.

Connecting with like-minded individuals can also enrich the journey. Seek out local clubs, online forums, or workshops to share experiences and learn from others. Follow the breadcrumbs of your interests, let it lead you to people, places and events that share these interests and see where it can take you. Seeking this not only deepens your knowledge but also provides accountability and motivation. Finally, integrate your passion into daily life. Whether it’s carving out moments to write, paint, or practice music, or finding ways to align your career or lifestyle with your interests, the consistent effort will cultivate a sense of fulfilment and joy throughout the year.

So give yourself the gift of your own reflection. I am starting to really understand that there are no answers that lay outside of me that matter more than what I can listen to within myself. So let’s take 5, or 10, or 30 minutes (even longer if we can) to really sit with ourselves, have a pen and paper, or a journal if you have one, and let’s ask ourselves some questions. Let’s look at where we’ve been, where we currently stand, and where we’d really like to go in this next year. You can have grander, longer timelines planned for yourself absolutely, but if you find this overwhelming, just start with where you are and what you’d like to see in the next 12 months. What habits do you wish to part with or improve, evolve and change? How can you go about this? What changes have worked before? What daily actions can you take to get to where you want to be? There aren’t really any rules, there’s more just, habits that we fall into instead. So follow your own rules and of course, hopefully these rules don’t include you planning mass murders etc so being kind is preferable, but even this is a conditioning in some way but other than not harming others and letting others be and live how they want to live, what’s the harm in making and following your own rules?

If we change inside, there is NO option for the outside to stay the same. If we change, everything around us naturally changes. So rather than trying to rush around and change everything and everyone outside of ourselves, let’s really work on improving and evolving ourselves first and foremost, which will require patience, compassion and consistency to our own being. This is not impossible, but it will take practice so don’t give up – there’s really no point in giving up because we are the only US there will ever be, no one else is coming along to change us or make us better. That responsibility lays with us, always. This is empowering, it is not to be feared. So take this by the horns and BE the change, like REALLY be the change that you wish to see around you going forward. If you want to see kindness, BE kindness. If you want to see more Love, BE more loving, especially to yourself! If you want things to be more simple, make things simple for yourself, don’t over complicate matters, challenge yourself to see what you can simplify. Change is inevitable, so don’t try to fight it or make it “not” happen, instead EMBRACE it. We are here on Earth School to learn, to grow, to evolve our being into the highest possible frequency we can! So sit with yourself, learn to love every aspect of your being, and let’s try and enjoy this very special limited time that we have here on Earth with those that we love. Don’t hold onto stuff that doesn’t matter anymore, get real clear with yourself what this is and work on letting it go. We don’t have time for anything less than authentic, inner, radiant beauty. BE the change you wish to see, don’t cling to silly distractions designed to keep you from noticing your inner magic. I wish you all a very happy, healthy, beautiful start to 2025 – no New Year New Me, you’re perfect today, just as you are and you are doing what you can. Keep up with the changes life wishes to present you, BE there to witness life in all its mysterious wonders. Lots of Love.

“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.” – Rumi

“There are plenty of difficult obstacles in your path. Don’t allow yourself to become one of them.” – Ralph Marston